A Ford To Lose

Atwood vs. Ford

It is abundantly clear that Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, his brother, Doug, and his other brother, Doug, failed to reap the innumerable benefits of the library during their formative years. No doubt too busy loitering in front of the Slurpee machine, giving passing shoppers the finger.

By the way, dear Fords, even if you cannot read, you should be embarrassed that you don’t know who Margaret Atwood is. This void in your cultural knowledge surely disqualifies you as true Canadians—fancy cottage notwithstanding.

Please return to Tralfamador as soon as possible.